Denmark x Depressed!Fem!Reader
They don’t know, no one can know how weak I am… right? He definitely can’t know that I’m so weak. I’m a wreak on the inside, lonely and broken, so sad, and so many words unspoken. I can never say anything… right?
The hard wood floor is cold against my back… so is the blade of the knife that lies beside me. My skin still unbroken, I could never actually do it. I’ve tried and tried to just end everything. I’m tired of the lonely insomniac nights, I’m tired of the ache in my heart, the ache that longs for someone to know… yet how can I tell them?
In a sudden fit of anger I grabbed the knife and pressed the tip into my breast, just above my heart, but yet still not hard enough to split my skin.
Frustrated, I’m so frustrated and angry. I can’t hear anything, and the tears are streaming down my cheeks. I know my phone's ringing on the other side of the living room, but I can’t even hear it, who would even call? Who would call such a broken woman?
I sit there, tears streaming down my cheeks, knife pressed into the soft tender flesh above my heart, nearly ready to slice the delicate organ apart, and I’m so angry all I hear is white noise.
And then a voice breaks through, and I’m so scared.
“(Name)?” It asks, shocked not expecting what it’s seeing. I know its Mathias, I don’t have to look to know its him. I can hear him approaching me slowly.
In a sudden jolt of both fear and embarrassment (mostly fear), the knife slips out of my grasp. It clangs to the floor between my thighs. The second it stops moving its gone, he’s already slid it across the room and down the hall, and his arms are around me in and instant.
He’s shaking, but he’s not crying, he’s scared… scared for me. I’m scared too. Choked sobs that I’ve been holding so long scream out. I’m clutching the back of his shirt so hard I feel like my hands will break. He doesn’t say anything, he just kneels there, knees on either side of my right thigh, his arms around me, my arms around his torso and my face pressed into his shoulder just above his heart. Its beating so fast, but I still can’t stop crying.
I don’t feel so lonely in this moment, here in his arms. I’m so weak, I start apologizing to him over and over. I’m shaking so much, but my grip on his shirt never falters. I beg him to forgive me in a sea of apologies.
“Its okay,” he whispers calmly. He moves over to my side, settling himself against the wall, taking me into his lap. I still haven’t lifted my face from his shoulder, but my grip of his shirt lessens.
All of the lonely thoughts I’ve hidden indie of me suddenly come bubbling out. I told him everything, and cried until my tears dried up. He listened to every word I said. Though he was silent, which was unusual for him.
We sat there for what seemed like hours. His arms wrapped loosely around my waist, and my face pressed into his shoulder, sitting in silence almost unmoving aside from his thumb rubbing circles into the small of my back.
“Why?” he finally spoke in a hushed voice. “Why would you feel like that? You know that I’m always here… there’s no need to feel so lonely.”
“Mathias…” I whispered so quietly I don’t even think he heard me. He unwound his arms from me, and brought his hands to my shoulders. He gently pushed me back and looked deeply into my eyes as I stared back with my bloodshot ones. He smiled, a small smile that almost wasn’t there and he leaned forward and placed a soft kiss on my forehead.
“(Name), you don’t need to worry anymore, I’m always here for you…” Mathias said, his smile growing a bit more and it was so sincere and loving I could have melted. I nodded, a small smile reaching my lips. He shifted me off of his lap and stood up, his hands sliding down my arms and grasping my hands, pulling me up with him.
It’s dark now, I couldn’t see anything, but I knew that he was leading me to my bedroom, his fingers interlaced with my own. I climbed into my soft bed snuggling myself into the sheets, Mathias following behind me. He wrapped his long arms around me and pulled me closer, I could feel his soft breathing in my hair. I was content, the loneliness now gone, and I was warm. My ear pressed against his chest, I closed my eyes and let the song of his heartbeat lull me to sleep.